Unicorn Pencils Included
Over the past few days, I’ve been engaging in some healthy reflection regarding the completion of my first year of grad school. I have come to realize that there are certain resources to which everyone should be granted access, and I am no longer willing to justify my lack of exposure to such resources. Solemn contemplation of this matter has led me to a fairly major decision:
My final year of school is scheduled to commence on August 26, 2008. On or before that date, I will be requiring a Trapper Keeper.
I am willing to consider any number of styles and/or generations of the Trapper Keeper, as long as it was manufactured prior to 1990 . Those I used to covet the most were the Lisa Frank designs, festooned with freedom-loving (but responsible!) unicorns, splashy rainbows, kittens with gigantic heads and malfunctioning tear ducts, and the inexplicable but obligatory Gumball Machine. I positively lusted after Trapper Keepers featuring these themes. Still, I nonetheless appreciated the ‘boy’-themed versions as well— robots, impossible racecars, the spike-collared bulldog who was somehow still precious… but to no avail. I was stuck loathing my dumb spiral-bound notebook while the other kids got to make excessive noise with their rad velcro Trapper tabs.
When I was 10, finally, my mom reluctantly gave her consent to my ostensible acquisition of a Trapper Keeper. Before I could actually get my grubby hands on one, however, we were informed that, for all intents and purposes, Trapper Keepers were officially banned from school grounds.
Sixteen years later, I am not taking no for an answer.